This is me and Minnie <3
Isn’t she just the most amazing thing? yes… yes she is. :D
Couldn’t tell if the water running down my face was from the shower or my tears.
Cheryl and Minnie left today. It was probably the last time I would ever be out at that barn… The place I spent close to 8 years of my life soaking in everything horses and learning. I know this probably sounds stupid to you all but even though it will only be two short weeks until I see my horse again I feel as if I have lost all her trust. She is going to a new place with new horses and I wont be there for her. She will think I abandoned her or sold her and that hurts to know. She will lose all the weight I had to fight to keep on her and will look like crap at the show.
And then after that I wont get to see her for a month. The first month of school where my life turns into a giant shit hole again and I don’t even have anywhere to escape. Minnie was the only thing where I could forget all my problems and feel calm for once. Things are just better when Im working with her and now I will have nowhere to turn.
You all probably think Im crazy, and I don’t blame you. I can’t even understand myself.
Great news todddaaaaayyy!! Its horsey related so if reining horses aren’t your thing feel free to not read this! :) So, turns out I could very possibly be getting my favorite baby that was born this year for FREE!!! AHHHH!!! She is absolutely stunning and out of Loveable Nic and her dam is the most solid minded and willing horse I have ever known. I am over the moon, I saw her (her name is Cookie but Im gonna change that…) and was starstruck so to hear I could own her is like leghsd;ghsd!!
Anywho…. good news for the day! I’ll post a picture of her later!!! :D
As all the people who are close to me will know, my world is based around my horses. The only place I feel safe is with them, the only place I am too distracted to worry about everything is with them. The only place I feel as if I am actually good at something… is with the them. I am truely happy with my horses even when they push my limits they teach me to better myself.
Well here is the news. Apparently my coach/trainer/idol/friend I have known since I was born has made the decision to back out of her reining training business of 15 years and get a job at a college hours away where I will never be able to see her until the summer months and even then who knows. This is practically the end of my dream…. and I’ve worked so FUCKING hard for everything. I can’t believe she would leave me, my mom, and everything behind just like that…. I have so much to learn from her still and even though she says I surpass almost every adult rider she knows and she truly believes in me, I need her guidance there is so much Im still unsure about, there is so much to learn still. That and in a few years time, maybe sooner I wont have a place to ride Minnie. From now on its just gonna be a boarding barn and to be honest most of the people that end up boarding where I train out of are bitches because they can afford to be. Yup. Good luck getting any fucking work done as I ride around their dumb ass jumping courses because they don’t have the courtesy to telll anybody when they are going to jump.
Fucking perfect. I swear to god if I end up having to give up Minnie, the horse I have worked so hard to earn and have busted my fucking ass and gave it my everything to even attempt to begin to understand this sport…. I can’t even begin to imagine. I swallow my tears as Im writing this, Minnie is sometimes the only reason I contemplate not wanting to do something drastic and basically ruin my life…. she is my dream, I can’t lose her… I can’t. I would rather swallow a handful of those pills that are so easily accessible than live without a purpose and lose everything that ever made me happy or felt as if I had a talent.
Me and Minnie <3 tribute video to reining!